Defenses Against Domestic Violence Accusations

 


 
False allegations of domestic violence can affect every part of a person’s life. Depending on any given individual’s personal circumstances, a domestic violence defendant can watch their job security crumble and relationships that they held dear vanish at a moment’s notice.
 

How To Defend Against False Accusations of Domestic Violence

 

The general population’s view of those charged with domestic abuse against a girlfriend, spouse, child, or anyone else can be a destructive force and a violation of one’s rights when the person charged with domestic violence is not guilty of their alleged crimes. Unfortunately, even proof of innocence can fail to repair one’s life and reputation once a person has been accused of these types of crimes.

 

Having assisted individuals facing a false accusation of domestic violence for several years, I have personally experienced several incidences where my clients were charged with domestic violence crimes for which I knew they were not guilty. In the majority of these cases, my clients are victims themselves. Victims of revenge plots thrown together by someone that they previously held dear, and in some cases, still do.

 

Before providing my hints, tips, and available actions that defendants may be able to use to their advantage, I would be doing a disservice if I failed to stress how important a case evaluation by an experienced legal professional can be for anyone trying to find out what to do when falsely accused of domestic violence.

 

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Need legal representation? Call (888) 250-2865 to receive help from our experienced and compassionate legal professionals 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

 

That said, there are several things for which someone who has been falsely accused of domestic violence can do to help ensure their rights are protected and freedoms secured. Laws in different states will vary widely, but the following concepts can be used to help you and yours who are faced with false domestic violence allegations.

 

What many do not realize until it is too late is that a lot of the damage that can be done by a false domestic violence accusation comes before charges are officially filed. The type of person that accuses another innocent person of committing violent acts against them is one that is regularly emotionally unstable. Emotionally unstable people tend to act out and commit irrational behaviors, such as falsely accusing you of attacking them.

 

liar
 

If your relationship begins to turn sour and your accuser begins to act in a way that leads you to believe that they will file false domestic abuse charges against you, there are some actions you can take to help limit other dangerous actions they can take to sabotage you.

 

  • Consult with a domestic violence defense attorney. Find someone in your area that provides free consultations and call to take advantage. Even if you are not planning to hire, the attorney can give you priceless information to help you better understand what your options are.

 

  • Protect your valuables. Do not just hope that they “would never do that”. In my experience, those who have false accusations brought against them for committing domestic violence rarely expect their accuser to actually go through with pressing charges, but they do. If your accuser steals your driver’s license, birth certificate, car titles, or money from you and then files charges against you, you may spend all of your time trying to get your stuff back rather than taking care of what needs to be done to ensure your freedom. A grave mistake that could cost you more than you thought possible.

 

  • Notify family members about your concerns. Unfortunately, family members may turn against you after news surfaces that you have been charged with committing domestic violence. If your accuser claims that you hurt them and/or your children, your closest family members may mistakenly ban you from their lives. If you keep them informed of your accuser’s erratic and troublesome behaviors, as well as your fears of what they may do, you may be able to prepare your family for the allegations and have them be more inclined to believe your side of the story.

 

  • Change all of your login information. Bank accounts, computers, laptops, vehicle entrance, hard drives, cell phones, and anything else you can think of that requires your password should be changed as soon as possible. There have been instances in which accusers send messages from the defendant’s cell phone and then later accuses them of sending threatening messages. Don’t let this or anything similar happen to you by securing anything and everything that you can.

 

  • If you are the abused, gather evidence. There are instances where the person who is accused of committing domestic abuse is actually the victim victim of physical and emotional abuse. If this is the case, gather as much evidence as you can without putting yourself in danger. If you feel that you are in any danger or are a victim of abuse now, contact your local abuse services to get immediate help.

 

Exposing False Allegations

 
Every accuser who pretends to be a victim has a motive for doing so. Sometimes the accuser has mental health issues. Sometimes the accuser enjoys the attention and sympathy that victims receive.

 

Sometimes the accuser is seeking vengeance. If the accuser believes the accused had an affair, making a false accusation may be a way to get even. Sometimes the accused just wants to get the accuser out of the family home.

 

Sometimes the accuser wants to gain an advantage in legal proceedings. Child custody fights and other family law battles may be decided in the accuser’s favor if a court believes that domestic violence occurred.

 

Identifying the reason for the false accusation is the key to defeating a domestic violence prosecution. Knowing why the accuser is telling a lie makes it possible to expose the lie.

 

A seasoned domestic violence defense lawyer will expose lies by cross-examining the accuser, by attacking the accuser’s credibility, and by presenting evidence of the accuser’s motive to lie. Any other evidence of innocence, such as an alibi, adds additional layers of reasonable doubt to the defense.

 

Exposing false allegations and revealing reasonable doubt lead to not guilty verdicts and dismissals of charges. Having an experienced domestic violence defense attorney makes all the difference when an accused is facing an accusation of domestic violence in Southern California.

 

Attorney for false allegations

 
Need legal representation to defend false accusations? Call (888) 250-2865 to obtain a free consultation 24/7.
 

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  • Ali Raheem

    Sep 14 2012 my gf & I i had an argument. as I was leaving for work she hit back of my head & called the police and had me arrested.. I was accused of pushing her with my left figure. Their reports says both of us had no injuries. I was in jail nearly a month where I was starved and I had to fight for my life against white gang members. I took a deal to get out of there alive. When I was out I ignored her as ordered by court. I did file a complain about police officers joking about being intimate with her. as I was being made homeless . oen night I got atext form her saying she is going to kill me I replies with what the fuck and then called the police. 4 months later they put me in jail. I was given 100 day sin jail 3 years probation and ordered to leave state of cali and pay her 3000. They used starvation .im to the point I can not sleep I have lost a year of my life over this. I lost my jobs my home my every thing . I am homeless now. I did go to hospital after jail and they documented that I had injuries to back of my head froma blunt force truma by a dog bone. In jail they would not let me see a doctor. even wheni was stabbed..

    • Tamara Hilton

      I TELL YOU NOT ONLY ONE GOING THROUGH THAT CAUSE I KNOW FOR FACTS THERE A LOT OF GOOD MEN OUT HERE GETTING CAUGHT IN THE SYSTEM SO KEEP YOUR HEAD UP;*)

      • AttorneyRandyCollins

        Thanks for the uplifting comment Tamara. Ali looks like he could use it.

      • Greg

        I went through it. I was falsely accused of it, it’s ruined my life. The lady who accused and lied about it was a career criminal, at that time I had no idea, she appeared to be beautiful inside and out, once she prayed on my kindness, I took her in, and she went crazy with accusations. I took a plea bargain not really understanding what I was signing, I know have a felony on my record. I’ve never had a felony in my life! I am now trying to get the decision over turned but its a horrible process, expensive, to the point I want to just give up. My life is ruined over someone else who lied. My advice to you is if your in a relationship? Ask early questions about the importance of a person’s background, if they appear offended? Run like the wind!

        • Randy Collins

          Sorry to hear about your struggle Greg. Hope you got the help you need.

        • Frank Riese

          Also, even if it does not help, please, please file a police report! They might not end up prosecuting anyone, but I think it might at least build some pressure and raise awareness for these issues! You can follow up with the prosecutor’s and sheriff’s office later to incentivize them to follow through. There are ways to prosecute perjury and defamation, although it can be difficult.

    • Jack Foley

      Hang in there brother. Fucking sucks.

      • AttorneyRandyCollins

        Thanks for the comment Jack.

    • AttorneyRandyCollins

      Hi Ali. What an awful situation. Unfortunately, instances of false accusations similar to your own happen all the time. Victims such as yourself have no voice, and they probably never will. No one wants to stand behind a possible wife beater, and I doubt that will ever change. Best of luck to you.

      • Frank Riese

        Dear Randy: I agree with your assessment of the current situation. The accusation and a court’s conviction is often enough to make people believe “where there is smoke, there is fire.” However, I am very worried about the way the US legal system has been heading and the severity and frequency with which innocent victims are violated with false protection orders is alarming.

        I am not sure I share your doubt that this situation will ever change. I think that we might in fact approach a tipping point when this situation becomes severe and widespread enough that Americans will demand legal reform and false accusations on protection orders receive the attention they deserve. In the legal community at least, lawyers in family court are well aware that protection orders are extremely common devices to get a leg up in divorce proceedings, for example. I wonder how many more mothers, family members, and friends of falsely accused it will take until people finally take notice, wake up, stand up and say: Enough is enough!

    • jbeme

      Yeah, good luck man.
      I have a dv charge and restraining order.
      Ex was trying to go even further. Thing is with these women, they hurt you as long as it hurts.
      I took a polygraph, told her if she doesn’t back off everyone she knows will be told about the real her, and then tanked my public life (this is the one most people have an issue with). If you volunteer to hurt yourself, they no longer have anything to hold over your head. And even though no one will believe you when you tell them about the real person your ex is, it makes it harder for her in the future to pull off the same stunt – so she will be afraid to push you to that point.
      Cut contact with her at that point and try to start over. Keep every advancement you make private as you can. It likely she will keep tabs on you, and may try to ruin your life if you ever get one back. Best if she has no way to find out.

      Good luck, it’s not an easy road.

    • overwhelmed247

      Im sorry this has happened. Im going through similar stuff. Where are our advocates or our rights? Too many people out there that abuse the system to ruin people. It needs to be known and people need to be more aware of things like this. The system just goes on a alleged victims word and especially if you are a male they feel the need to arrest you immediately. I had faith in the system until i was unfortunately awakend to how many innocent people out there are ruined by it based on heavy case loads and desensitized prosecutors and judges. Its horrible.

      • Randy Collins

        It really is. The system assumes that the victim is telling the truth, and people like you suffer. Hope you received the help you need.

    • Jess

      @Ali Raheem
      I’m female, but almost the exact same thing happened to me–it’s uncanny how much of a similar experience we share. I was victimized and abuses by this person once, rotted in jail, starved, beaten, neglected, not given my chemotherapy, humiliated and down right tortured. I lost absolutely everything in my life except luckily, the person who became the love of my life. My house, pets, job, school, friends, family, children–all gone. Similarly, this person would routinely stalk me to the point I was having constant panic attacks, and called the police on numerous occasions where i was then carted off the jail four more times. At what was supposed to be the resolution of my case, this obviously unstable monster, if you will, called the bondsman and said I was jumping bail–so two exits before court my car was blocked and I was arrested in the most humiliating fashion, totalling 6 arrests. This person filed a restraining order against me so they could stalk me and make these despicable accusations with impunity. I also became homeless among numerous other things. I stay at a relatives currently who is incredibly wary of me and the children (who adore me). We need a united front. False allegations are NOT a victimless crime, NOR should ruining someone’s life be a misdemeanor–it should be a felony for which you MUST go to prison. There is so much bias, racism and discrimination that goes along with this it is sickening.

      Please contact me at adreamofform@gmail.com

      –Jess

      • Ali Raheem

        I’m sorry you had to go through that

        • Eladio

          You need to turn to Jesus Christ. And get into a State of Grace and turn your life around. It will happen. God bless.

          • corby

            what the hell??
            maybe Jesus wil arrest the attacker?

      • Frank Riese

        Hey, Jess! There needs to be legal reform in this country around protection orders. I will dedicate my life to this cause. Although it had been my impression that mostly men are subjected to protection orders, it is sad to see, but maybe also the necessary tipping point that increasingly women are also victimized by indiscriminately doled out protection orders, with little regard for people’s civil rights. I will contact you shortly.

    • Frank Riese

      Ali, your story is so incredible, consider starting a blog about it, as I have. What you have experience are civil rights abuses, IMHO. It might be worth contacting the ACLU about it. What is happening right now in the US, with VAWA and such, is nothing short of gender based discrimination and violence in my view. I can honestly say that this is nothing short of human rights abuses and should be unconstitutional. The enforcement of laws is deeply sexist.

      You should get justice! Since you have written this over a year ago, I do not know how you are faring. I hope that you are okay. I know of many people in those situations who ended up taking their own life. I had been pretty close to that after being falsely accused and I want you to stay strong! Please rebuild your life!

      • J. Williams

        NO- it happens to gay men and women too.

    • HUNTER

      do you think if you were making a million dollars a year and could afford a great criminal defense lawyer your situation would be different? or had a video camera in your “house” or “apartment” for security reasons? are you poor? ali?

    • Judson Bullard

      My wife went crazy one morning and threw a cigarette and it hit me in the forehead and I got a mark on my neck..but he police officer said that some old marks were from my wife….they arrested her I never went to court …but I told the court that my wife was put on meds that caused her to go crazy..and that some marks weren’t from her…so they gave me a paper called victim impact statement and they told me to write what the cop said ….so I put that she needed help and that she didn’t touch me where the cop said she did…her case was dismissed and one month later I was arrested for false police report….when my lawyer asked for show cause they told my lawyer that they couldn’t let her see the evidence because I’m he victim and only I could see the statement. ….so my lawyer told the courts then you can’t use the statement for evidence. ….but yet I’m still being sentenced on Friday without any evidence. …how can they do this to me

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  • JJ Bisnar

    That’s crazy man! You probably shouldn’t be posting that stuff on a public forum though :/

  • Jacki Eichman

    I hate hearing this type of stuff and I’m sure it happens a lot. Sorry

    • Randy Collins

      It does happen a lot. I can’t tell you how often I receive calls for this and other instances of false charges. Thanks for the comment. Take care.

  • jamaal

    My waif eaccused me of pulling a knife on her, after attempting to walk away i was detained by Lapd even though i did not have a knife on me i wasnt fharged witha crime but i ended up losing my kids in cps court andthe judge granted her full custody and gave me limited visitiation rights she has since then went out her way to try to get me to hit her even though i am a peaceful person

    • AttorneyRandyCollins

      That’s awful Jamaal. You’re not alone. Take care.

      • Joshua

        I recently moved to indiana never had trouble with the law and officer had pestered me and my girlfriend’s since she moved here from California seemed ever night he would attack us say he would let us go with a warning I will admit tone night the officer got physical with me I defended myself trying to push him off not once laying a finger on him but he says I did got three other officers to step in help please?

  • http://cabreralawoffices.com/ petercabrera

    Very nice tips. Making false allegations of domestic violence is a new tactical weapon that many women or men use because once the accusations are made, the defendant is typically presumed guilty. Once you have been accused of this violent behavior it is unfortunately your burden to prove your innocence while also dismantling the credibility of the accuser’s claim.

    • AttorneyRandyCollins

      Thanks for the comment Peter.

  • Douglas Self

    I likewise was the ‘victim’ of phony DV charges. Among the things that helped get the case dismissed was that I was able to show receipts and get video recordings of my attendance at a gym that I regularly frequented at the date and time that my ‘insignificant other’ claimed that I ‘battered’ her. She claimed that she went to my house where I still had some of her things and when she arrived that I pushed her out of the doorway but didn’t leave any injuries or marks. The date claimed was 15 days prior to the ‘big blowup’, where I called the sheriff’s office to have her removed as she was being ‘unruly’, and they arrested me instead!
    My frank advice are to do two things: (1) get and maintain video surveillance of your domicile, with backup to the ‘cloud’ or other off-site storage (e.g., the lying skank, her friends, or the cops can’t compromise it, and DON’T KID YOURSELF that cops won’t DESTROY EVIDENCE that would get you off (“exculpatory”, I believe the legal eagles call it) and (2) keep a scrupulous, detailed log of your travels, which include vehicle(s) used, departure location and time, arrival location and time, noting also places where purchases, especially fuel, are made. Make sure this is also backed up to a secure location. Having proof of your activities and whereabouts, rather than being subject to “Big Brother”, may in fact SAVE YOUR ASS in the wake of a phony DV charge(s).

    • AttorneyRandyCollins

      Hi Douglas. Glad to hear you got the defense you needed to clear your name. Many others are not so lucky. Take care.

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    • AttorneyRandyCollins

      Thanks for the comment.

  • Mss Nesha NewMee

    My ex came to my house with his sister to get his belongings in another females car. Well of course I was angry,confused, furious. I swung at him bit didn’t make contact what so ever he picked me up by my throat and thru me on the concrete where I was scrapped up on my arm and leg. I didnt take pictures or record anything I just wanted him out of my life without going this far. However, he filed charges on me saying I hit him because he felt I was going to report him and he is on probation. I received a letter and a citation for this I refuse to pay anything because its not true so I’m going to do the pretrial hearing. How will this play out in court when I’ve never been arrested for anything like this and he is a convicted felon more than 3 times I’m so confused and frustrated with this. What should I do???

    • Aidan Hodge

      I would suggest deleting every post including this one where you mention that you swung at him and talk to a lawyer in person. Most, including myself, would view swinging at him as an act of domestic violence and thus guilty whether it made contact or not and whether or not he decided to defend himself, so you are either going to have to take responsibility for your actions or you are really going to need a lawyer for this if the charge is actually important to you and hopefully learn that swinging at someone is not an acceptable course of action to take.

      • AttorneyRandyCollins

        Great comment Aidan. I haven’t looked at the comments on this post for a while, but it seems as though you were able to get someone to take down information that was possibly incriminating.

  • Brodie Hunsaker

    I was accused of domestic violence 2 nights ago by my ex she claims i choked her but its a lie. I have audio recording of the incident and you can clearly hear us argue for about 10 mins she raised her voice at me so i did the same and she called the cops and I left. You hear me grab my phone, keys and walk out the door get into my truck and leave. Not once do you hear her say anything about placing my hands on her. Do you think the audio recordings I have will help me in court?

    • AttorneyRandyCollins

      That’s awful Brodie. I suggest contacting a domestic violence defense attorney in your area that you trust and take advantage of a free case evaluation. It is not a good idea to share the details of your case on a public website. This should not be considered legal advice nor does it constitute an attorney client relationship.

  • Arlisa Sanders

    My fiancé has a stocker ex girlfriend that has filed a false domestic violence charge against him we have been to court for times she has not shown that they issued issued a warrant for her arrest she was finally arrested a day before the next court date by the DA we have proof on the date that she said the incident occurred that he was with me celebrating my birthday party any advice what he can do to get this dismissed

  • caligrown

    My finance n myself had an argument on7-3-15, a verbal argument. It was loud yes, appearantly my neighbor called 911 n the police came. When they got here my fiance was out taking a ride on his bicycle n I was playing w/my cat n fixing a coffee table. He called n said he was coming back n I said ok cuz the police were here n we can get this straightened out. 3 doors down he rode up to the police n said my girlfriend said u wanted to talk to me, at tht point they arrested him. When 1 of the officers walked his bike back, I asked what happened n he said they arrested him. I asked why n he said he n his partner felt they had just cause. The police officers (2) talked to me all of 10 min. on the patio, and all they wrote down was my name n his. I told them that we had a verbal argument. 1 asked if anyone was in the house, I said no, he asked if he could look, I said, yeah, he came back out n then took off. On the 7th, he went to court n the D.A. added false imprisonment n corporal injury. No pics were taken bcuz I had no injuries. Oh, i did have a scratch on my lip, caused by my cat. The judge then put a 3 yr. restraining order on him too. Could not believe what I was hearing! At the next court date the bail was lowered 110,000.00 n I bailed him out. 5 days later whn he returned to next court date D.A. added another charge of coercing a victim/witness by force! And took him back into custody. This is so unjust!!!! Here in Lancaster, CA. they have got to be the most corrupt sheriffs anywhere! My fiance has a history but he paid for that already. It has nothing to do w/him now n how’s he doing. No DV ever let me add. This has been taken all the way to superior court. Next date is in a month n that’s the pre-trial. I have found out that the officer said on his statement things I did not say! The D.A. has disrespected me by saying I’m full of s–t n the detective has threatened me by saying if I as much as wink at neighbor, I’m going to jail. she did tht when SHE served the supoena. She also said when I called her, you know he’s a very bad man you know”. A bit biased right. It’s really gotten out of hand. what happened to innocent until proven guilty? What happened to alleged victim having anything to say about said incident. Don’t I have the right to not want a restraining order? Don’t I have the right to say it was a verbal argument n nothing else. I mean, how can they put all these false charges on him n get away w/it. No pics, no body cams, no dash cams,. These are allegations tht the D.A. has filed. I never said any thing to justify such lies. I was alone when the cops drove up. I had no injuries on me. This is all bcuz he has a record n nothing else. They are ruining our lives! He has lost his job n chance to go to school to b an electrician for the union n much more. I have lost way to much weight n have gone into the red 8,000.00, the pain n suffering bcuz of this very corrupt system is real n has my doctors a lil bit concerned. We r 50-70 yrs young. I just can’t believe tht the state can put charges on someone, FALSE CHARGES at tht, w/o alleged victim having any say what so ever.

  • Bernard Harris Jr

    Hello,
    After breaking up with my girlfriend of 3 years, she and I were downtown Richmond discussing settling up bills. This resulted in an argument and my ex charging and swinging on me twice. Both times she was stopped by pushing her back but never striking her. We are in front of federal and state buildings with cameras everywhere, so when she tells me she is going to call the police on me. I flag down the capital police. I did this knowing the evidence was in my favor. They acknowledged the cameras would have caught the incident but that was it! I was told I would most likely be taken into custody. She said she did not want to press charges and I declined as well, she has since told me the Officers have contacted her encouraging to press charges. I’m not worried because the video will prove my innocence, but why wouldn’t they use the evidence instead of pushing to arrest me?
    Bernard

    • overwhelmed247

      Unfortunately the police are more willing to arrest a male instead of a women. Its ridiculous as men are victims of domestic violence also. I believe there is a law out there forcing the police to make a mandatory arrest for any domestic violence altercation. And because you are a male you are targeted. This is far to common and needs to be brought into the light. There are too many innocent men going to jail for nothing. Too many prosecutors and judges that are desensitized to even investigate the males claim. I hope it all worked out for you. And please be careful in those situations

  • Cherish Kreibom

    On the 8th of this month my fiancé was arrested for allegedly assaulting me after having a small argument and some idiot called police and said he assaulted him which there was no marks or anything on him nor any on me. My fiancé have me a hug nothing else to calm me down as I have add and am carrying his kid. We are on income support and right now he’s trying to get it he can come home and these charges and no contact order thrown out as my statement was not taken nor was I checked out. Only the guy who called this little argument in was asked to do a statement. They didn’t have me checked out not was I even asked if I was okay. He is not a violent guy as he wouldn’t hurt anyone especially me and his unborn son which i am due November. Police want to have our baby taken from us as they think I’m suicidal which is not true. I submitted an affidavit on the 16th. I’m worried that he won’t be around for our kid and be there for his birth as I’m needing him around. I don’t need this stress.

  • Cindy

    I really need help my x husband of 25 years has recently called the cops three days in a row on myself after serving him with contempt of court orders and other court documents for the sale or refinance of our house and now he filed ex parte hearing for domestic violence on me and I have to go tomorrow morning I’m confused and scared because I don’t know what is claims are

  • Janet Sims

    My boyfriend was charged with Domstic Violence 3. Wrongly charged. We were fussing after the bar on a very public street. The officer was about 100 yards away from us and came running up saying that he saw my boyfriend push me. (My fb has never touched me or threatened to) He never pushed me, just touched my shoulders and said that he was going to the car and was worried about my safety with me walking off to cool off. My bf spent that night in jail. The cop had on a cam, so he has entire conversation. Our lawyer isn’t specialized in criminal defense or DV, and everywhere we read says we can get this dismissed before trial. The lawyer subpoenaed for the video. I wrote my affidavit and am presenting it to the prosecutor at the plea. Are we doing this correctly? Please help. This would ruin our lives.

  • MNaik

    Hey. I’m 18 and falsely accused of kidnapping my bestie (girl). She had a plan to go out and having some fun around for some days. So I agreed to it and went out for some days. I treated her like an elder sister and helped her out in gettin her out of depression, in her academics etc. I knew she had some personality disorder. (attention seeking and multiple personality) and a drug addict. Still I was with her always helping her out in all ways possible. But I didn’t know it was a plan to put me into trouble. One day we decided to go out to some hill station. I was on a bike with a friend and she on other bike with another friend. We were later traced by the cops and her parents reached there on that spot and slapped and treated me like a criminal while my my friend fled off in the bike seeing us gettin caught coz they were behind us while riding. I was so damn scared and didn’t know what to do. They were asking me all whereabouts and were asking me why I took her away. I was like wtf it was her plan and why the hell would I take her somewhere she ain’t no kid that I’ll take her. I even have the pics of her enjoying during the whole trip still they didn’t believe. Somehow later she arrived the place coz the cops called em up. And she was crying and acting like she was abducted. She wasn’t ready to say a word.. While giving a statement (idk what’s that called. Some paper) she had written that I took her to my place, drugged her after which she felt dizzy and did whatever I told her to do. I was like wtf this is not true. I told her to tell the truth. She was just acting out all against me. When our bags were checked they found a knife inside my bag. (I didn’t know about it. She had kept it the previous day inside my bag)which again went against me. Lot of cops shit happened. Her parents have said so many shitty things about me that I do drugs and I’m psycho which disturbs me a lot even though I know I’m innocent. I trusted that bitch too much.. All these things are settled as for now but anything can happen later. I’m still in trauma and feel like each person on the road is watching me suspiciously even when they’re not. I don’t know this is so fucked up.

  • Yuliya Arku

    Thank you for such an article!
    I can say exactly the same having bad experience with my husband. Despite on I live in Belgium and the legislation differs, I state that the advices are very practical. I started to make a udiotapes, so my husband broke my phone and computer, thinking I am saving my tapes on them, so in addition: SHARE YOUR EVIDENCES ON CLOUD SERVISES DIRECTLY!!!! And after that he lied, that I broke my devices by myself!!! WHILE IT WAS ME WHO WAS CALLING THE POLICE EXACTLY AT THE MOMENT!
    Also my husband said to the police that I had attacked him with a knife (!!!)
    ALSO! Keep your documents and make scans and copies! Don’t keep them in one place!

  • Moshe

    Me and my girlfriend were super drunk a few days ago, we went back to home and started to have sex, I don’t remember exactly what happened, I was so drunk I really don’t remember, then we started to fight during sex and I ended up with scratches all over my face and neck, I called the police and I give them a report about what she did, but now I’m sure this happened to me during sex and she didn’t intent to do it, we’ve been together for almost a year and she is super calm IDK what happened that day, we never drink but that day we did and now she has to go to court. I went to the victim attorney the day they read the protective order and they allowed her to stay with me and everything cus I basically dropped the charges, but now I’m concerned about what is going to happen on the trial, any suggestions? Should I try to talk to the judge or be called to give me statement? What should I do to help her?

    • Randy Collins

      Hi Moshe. I suggest contacting a domestic violence defense attorney in the County that the charges have been filed in. Many offer free case evaluations. Please do not post any more information on a public form as it could be referred to later. Good luck to you.

  • Cynthia Rm

    Hi, me and my bf have always had our differnwce. We have always been an off and on couple. We currently have a 1yr an half old son. One day, we were arguing and he started pushing me and pulling me giving me bruises. I ended doing a police report on that night. After a few month He would still look for me and I really saw he wanted to change, so We got back together. Months later we got into an argument and split up. He wants to file for custody of my son. Will there be any consequence because i never called the cops .? And i would have contact with him? I worry for my son. I live in california btw.

  • Rebecca

    My fiance was asleep his blood pressure was sky high an just wirked 13 hours while he was,asleep my son who getting ready to turn 18 gets in my fiance truck an drives it up an down the road with no lisence. when he pulls in my fiance disoriented run out side telling him to park the truck while coming in the door my fi was,sitting in the chair my fiance leant in to kiss me when he did his leg give out my son beat my fiance in the head with his huge cell phone busting his head an he had a slight concussion.. my fiance then went to confront my son who was hid in my bathroom while they sruggked with the door the door hit my son causing a knot that went away the next morning.. anyway the cops showed up an said it was concurred assualt on family member minding u he never hit me an my son got hit with the door.. what’s our next step to prove innocence

  • Veritas Aequitas

    OK, here is a small back story to set the situation, I am an addict, I’m in recovery and have been working hard for 8 months to stay sober, my fiance is an addict, and she is on the suboxone program, but still drinks more than “I” think she should. We have a 2 1/2 year old son and have been “separated” for about 6 months. However, we are still very much entwined in each others lives. Here is the beginning: The night before the incident, I had picked our son up from daycare and brought him home to a very sick mama. I fed them both, bathed our son and tucked them both into bed and stayed snuggled with my fiance until she fell asleep. I had already stated that she is to stay in bed the following morning and that i was going to come and pick our son up and take him to day care. The following morning I arrived ten minutes past the time i was supposed to, but had talked via text with my fiance and everything was fine, when I arrived, the door was locked and the tv was loud enough to be heard outside. I pounded on the door for close to 2 minutes and then went around to the front and through the slider to find my fiancee passed out and our 2 year old watching tv and perfectly fine. (all of the what ifs raced through my mind though). I called out her name once and then checked her breathing and her pulse, she was fine as well, just very tired i guess. I left without her waking and left the slider open on purpose. Two hours later, she called in a panic and I played dumb just long enough to invoke the reaction that I was wanting before telling her what I had witnessed that morning, she was crying and sounded genuinely upset and scared that she had been so sound asleep. Later that day, I picked our son up and brought him home to my fiance’s to find her still asleep, but awoke as we came through the door. I purposely avoided discussing the days events because I was getting very concerned and wanted to think it through before i opened my mouth, but my fiance was persistent on discussing it and got angry with me when I didn’t have an answer. When i finally said “you were so passed out that you couldn’t hear me pounding on the door, how could you hear if anything were to happen to our son?” She immediately responded with an incident two years prior, where I had left one of my rifles out on the bed after cleaning it and our son “could” of gotten a hold of it.(Problem is, I agreed with her then and still do now and take many precautions to keep my guns in a safe place.) Due to her tone, I knew where this was going and made a B line for the door and said something to the affect of “you are sick and you need to get help. I have already talked to your family about today and something needs to change”. I was just grabbing the door knob when she blocked me from leaving, at this point, she scratched my eye while grabbing for the door and I truly believe she didn’t mean to, but it caused a head jerk response and upon me bringing my arms up and head forward she was reaching for the pistol I normally carry because I have a concealed pistol license through the county I reside in. Coincidentally, I had pawned my pistol only a few hours before because of the huge amount of guilt that my fiance had given me about purchasing it.Her reaching for it and saying somewhat loudly, “Where is your gun? Where is your gun, huh?” Seemed threatening to me and at that point, i had no idea what her intentions were, Based on where my right hand was at, it was simple and logical for me to grab her at the pressure point where her neck meets her shoulder, basically my thumb on the front left side of her neck near the shoulder and fingers on the back left side of her neck near her shoulder blade, I then squeezed with increasing pressure while shouting let go of me, let go of me now until she let go of me. I immediately got out of the door and she followed screaming all sorts of obscenities and claiming she was going to call the police, i told her to go ahead and that SHE was the one who would get in trouble. Several minutes after I left I received a text from her containing 3 pictures of an obvious red mark on the left side of her neck from my thumb and some very slight redness on the front of her neck and onto the right side of her neck. She also stated that the police are on there way. Not being one to wait, I dialed 911 and was asked what happened, I gave a specific but brief account of the incident and was instructed to wait for a call from the officer assigned to the call. Shortly after, an officer called and asked my side of things, i gave him this same exact story, almost word for word and admitted that I may have squeezed her neck and shoulder to hard in order to get her to let go of me, but that I was afraid of what she was trying to do by grabbing for my gun that obviously I knew that I din’t have, but she did not know. He instructed me to stand by and that he may call back and ask that I meet him to be taken into custody pending the outcome of his investigation. He called roughly an hour later and said that it looks like i choked her and asked that I meet him. I complied and made it very clear that I was cooperating and was commended several times by the officer for doing so. I was taken to jail, booked for assault 4 DV and later found out that the officer tried to upgrade the charge to assault 2 DV after further reviewing the pictures that were taken. In his report, he changed my wording on a couple of key statements that made me look as if I were lying and the order in which his report says the incident happened is also off, again making me look like the aggressor. Court was 3 days later where I was assigned a public defender that has yet to do me any good. My bail strangely went from $5K at booking to $40K during court due to the involvement of a “firearm”. I threw my hands up and yelled stop, my attorney was babbling about needing another 30 days to review and didnt even try to get my bail lowered. I told the judge there was not a firearm involved and that I had proof, she lowered it to $25K and my attorney still said he wanted set back 30 days, the judge asked if was going to be able to post bail and I said I dont see how and she asked do I still want to push it back 30 days, I said no, my attorney said yes and court was over. I have not talked to my attorney since, i was able to post bail a couple days later and have court in two days which I’m sure will be pushed back another 30 days. There is a NCO and it has been VERY difficult to see my son. My fiance seems not very concerned about the NCO, seeing as she calls, texts and messages me regularly and has called upon me a few times to help with our son when she was unable to pick him up or the like. She also has stated that she wishes she never would have called the police and has asked if she can write a letter or something to get the charges dropped. My one and only reply was “you and I arent supposed to be talking, especially about anything surrounding my case and you need to talk to an attorney or mine if you have any questions” So, self defense being the most commonly used defense in DV cases, is it going to be harder to prove that i was acting in self defense,or harder for the state to prove I wasn’t or am I delusional and what happened is clearly NOT self defense? Thank you ahead of time for any advice, I hope to hear back from my pretender tomorrow, but if not, am I allowed to fire him even though I was ordered to pay $250 by the judge? Again, thank you for your time. – Jason B. WA state

    • Randy Collins

      Hi Veritas,

      Posting your case information on a public form is not going to help you. I suggest contacting a domestic violence defense attorney in the county that you are facing charges. They should have experience with your court specifically and many offer free case evaluations. You can use a free case evaluation as an opportunity to have your questions answered by a legal professional.

  • Alicia Jackson

    Me n my child father had a fight n I was upset so I went to the police station n made up a lie because I was hurt that he was leaving me is there a way I can get him out I need help please someone

    • disqus_TkaD9WSatw

      You idiot…I am sorry but you idiot…You do not fucking lie to the police about the father of your children….Pure fucking evil woman, dumb, idiot of a woman. From someone who has been there, I hope he is smart enough and strong enough to get a divorce from you.

    • overwhelmed247

      Unfortunately women like you are the reason many innocent men are in jail. Their entire world is turned upside down. Why? Because your upset? Vindictive? Hopefully it weighs heavily on your concience for the rest of your days. The damage women like you cause follows the falsely accused the rest of their lives. I hope karma is a real thing.

      • Randy Collins

        False accusations are real, but real victims of domestic violence sometimes recant their stories because they want to free the defendant. We don’t know which case Alicia is…

    • Randy Collins

      Hi Alicia,

      You’re not the only one. By contacting the D.A. and telling him or her your story you might be able to help. They might not believe you, or choose not to believe you, but by doing so you will have done your part to try and reverse the damage done. Take care.

  • Adam Lopez

    I have a question my x girlk friend told me everytime I have my son on Saturday my son has bruises on his body I told here then send I have hem you see it tack pic show me she has not can I make a police report of being accused of that
    adamblopez@gmail.con

  • Adam Lopez

    I have a question for you my ex girlfriend said every time I have my son has bruises on his body which is not true can I make a police report on that

    • overwhelmed247

      Cover your ass and at least tell the police. There are far too many women out there that abuse the system to get their way. Please make a report so you dont end up in jail for falsified info.

      • Adam Lopez

        Thank you

        • overwhelmed247

          Your welcome. My life has been turned upside down based on falsified police reports. They tend to believe women more than a man. So cover yourself and make it known what she is doing or planning.

    • Randy Collins

      Hi Adam. Posting information on a public form is not a good idea. You may benefit from obtaining a free case evaluation from an attorney in your area that assists domestic violence defendants. Many offer free case evaluations and can give you information that will help you make informed decisions.

  • overwhelmed247

    I was falsely accused of dv. The woman i was seeing at the time has mental issues. Borderline personality disorder, ptsd, manic, and bipolar. She has spent a number of weeks over the 4 years i was with her in a mental health lock up unit for suicide attempts. She has hit me with soda cans, baseball bats, amd basically anything else she got her hands on. I should have called the police but i didnt. She has 4 kids (not mine) and the last thing i wanted to do was have them end up in foster care. And i didnt want her to go to jail either. Well i got to a point where i decided it was time to end the relationship and really meant it. When i did she played the suicide card as always and I use to come running back because ive seen her overdose on clonopin before and it was very scary. Ive so seen her slash herself with razors amd many other self destructive things. Last thing i wanted was to have that ob my concience. But this time i needed to get out of this. The next day she was calling and threatening suicide yelling how fast she was going in her car and saying i was going to hear her die. Also if that didnt work she was going to overdose. I was very worried about her. So i swung by her home just to make sure she was ok. She was thank god. She started to yell so i turned away and went to my car. I brought my car to the shop because to add insult to injury i got a flat on my way home. The police came to the shop and arrested me on, criminal tresspass, Stalking DV. She had said i climbed in her window and wouldnt leave which is completely false. I went to jail and was bailed out they notified her i was bailed out and while i was walking around my neighborhood she pulled up and begged me to talk with her and if i didnt she would kill herself. I didnt want to but again the last thing i wanted was to have someones suicide on my concience. I was an AEMT and worked for hospice so my job is to preserve lives not have them go early. I got in the car and we talked she said she was going to tell the truth to the police. She wanted me back etc…. I told her we really needed space and id like to go home. We were in her town and i just had her drop me off at a coffee shop because she said she was going to the police to tell the truth. Well as i was walking back home i ended up getting arrested again for bail conditions, stalking, tampering. I got bailed out again and couldnt believe what was happening. Later that day she calls me and tells me the police threatened to take her kids away if she changed her story they sent patrol to look for me. She had her 4 year old which she knows I have bonded with get on the phone and say he loves and misses me. Then she begged me to meet her and she would make this right. She wouldn’t take no. Used suicide and the kids to basically guilt me into going. I didnt know what to do. So i did what now i wish i hadnt. I went and met her and sure enough she had the 4 year old with her. She brought me to her house telling me the other kids miss me and need to see me. We talked and u just told her i needed space after all that has happened. She told me if she cant have me nobody will and got upset and said she was suicidal. I tried to leave and she got even more suicidal. She said she was going to overdose on her old pills. So i toom the old pills and dumled them in the toilet to avoid that. I fell asleep as did she and then next day she brought me to my car and while on the way she said she is going to go and tell the truth etc. Etc. I got a call from my work suspending me and i was crushed. My job was everything i had woked for my entire life. I was devastated. I had begged my boss to hire this woman because she had no career and was struggling. She went from 11 dollars and hour to 32 because i begged my boss to give her a chance and here i am losing my job basically because of lies. So i just got out of the car without saying a word. Well she took that as an insult and went and told the police a bunch of more made up stuff and i went to jail and thats where i stayed for 2 weeks. It was the worst thing i have ever been through. She wrote me emails while i was in jail which my attorney has about loving me etc. She has sent a sworn letter to the prosecutor, my attorney and myself saying she lied about it all because i broke up with her and she was angry and off her meds. She has vacated the restraining order telling the judge it was all made up. She has filed for bail conditions to be removed saying it was all made up and i was not a threat or a bad person. The prosecutor does not care. The 2 tampering charges were dismissed. The 12 misdermeanors were no prossed and now the prosecutor is bringing forward 3 counts of stalking and a criminal trespass. My lawyer said they want me to plead guilty to 1 misdemeanor with a suspended sentence because they can prove i was with her on 2 occasions. I dont know what to do. I dont want to plead to anything because it was all.a lie from a mental person that was off her meds. I only went with her so she didnt kill herself which i have witnessed in the past. I cant have this on my record my career will be ruined. My life has been turned upside down. Any advice will do. I have to make a decision by the end of this week. Feb 13th 2016.

    • Randy Collins

      Hi. Unfortunately, I am a California lawyer, so the information I have only applies to the state of California. I suggest contacting a domestic violence defense attorney in the County that you are facing charges. Many offer free case evaluations. Good luck to you.

  • Nichole Lindgren

    My boyfriend got taken. I told them I was screaming in his face anyone would have pushed someone away from their face. He is caught in the system and Noone be lives me. They think I’m some battered women trying to cover for him. He is. Good man, would never hurt me! Its a felony because our son was there. WHT can I do?!

    • Truscorpio14

      My husband and I have been together for nine years now. Throughout our marriage I have had a lot of trust issues due to having been cheated o and left pregnant by my ex in my previous relationship of three years. Back in 08/25/2003. So in my marriage now I have caused my husband to get inarcerated by making false police reports. Just last year i let anger build up within me and didn’t try to let him know that little things such as him going to the store and taking long and him stopping by at his friends home for like half an hour here and there were pissing me off. Because in my head I felt as if he was out cheating on me. So one day I set myself to find a away to go through his phone without him knowing or me ever having to have it in my hands. So as time went by I did find a way. What I thought was fun to do became something that messed me up more and I began to pick fights and accuse him of hitting me and made a false police report. He got locked up and a month later he came out we went to court together to clear off the restraining order the judge had set for us. And we are still together. I have became more open to him and I admit I do have insecurities still but last year I let my anger get the best if me and did it again because I had went through his phone and seen porn on it.. So yes I did it again. I flipped out and made up a big lie. I now feel as if I have so much guilt within me and just last month i recieved a letter from the kings county district attorneys office stating they had picked up the charges and my husband has court on the 29th. Since that incident last year we have grown closer and I talk to him about everything and spend more time as a family with our babies together and happy. But now I don’t know what to do so the district attorney to know that I falsly caused him of hitting me just because I was angry and wanted him to feel like I did when I seen the porn on his phone. Please help me I am willing to take full responsibility for my false accusations and i volunteer to sign myself into angermanagent classes domestic violence classes and counseling as long as he and my babies don’t suffer for my wrong doings and my own personal issues caused by the heartache pain and fear of losing what I truly love dearly. Can you please help me.? Or give me advice on what I could do in my case?

      • mrcanada976

        First, get some counselling. You obviously have serious trust issues and your going to need to deal with that. Next, get him to change all his passwords so you won’t be tempted to go through his personal information. I don’t know why so many chicks think this is OK, and it is the cause of dumb fights over nothing because a text message taken out of context can get blown out of proportion. Finally, call the cops and report your lies and ask them to keep them on file in case you do something like that ever again.

        I’ve had women go through my texts, my phone, my email, my Facebook, my laptop, my journal, web history, and probably a whole lot else on top of contacting my roommates trying to dig up dirt and possibly my family.

        If you find yourself doing this it’s time for you to get fired by your SO because I’m sorry lady, it’s not OK. Just because you don’t have a Y chromosome doesn’t make it OK to snoop. And don’t tell me a fools story that ladies flirt and get asked out all the time – I’ve slept with enough girls with boyfriends and had them exchange salacious text messages and pictures that I know if someone went through your stuff they could probably find something incriminating – even if you never cheated or did anything wrong.

        I don’t understand why girls think this is OK when they are texting and tapping constantly on their own phones to God knows who about God knows what.

    • Randy Collins

      Hi Nichole,

      Unfortunately, your situation is extremely common. Although the authorities are trying to protect you, it sounds like they are just making matters worse. Regardless, one of the best things you can do is get information from a legal professional that you trust. Finding an attorney in the county for which your boyfriend is facing charges and obtaining a free case evaluation may help you to get your questions answered. They might not be the answers you want, but at least you’ll have a better idea of what options you have. It is not a good idea to post information about the case on a public form. Good luck to you. Take care.

      • Nichole Lindgren

        Thanks anyway 🙂

        • Navi River

          Hey, i know this was 6 months ago, but i am going through the same thing. I wanted to know if it got dropped or not. What did you do? I got a lawyer and i’m sure my partner did as well. The pre-trial is coming up and i haven’t been to court before.

          If you could, give me any information about your experience, it would help immensely

          • AttorneyRandyCollins

            Hi Navi,

            I suggest contacting an attorney you trust to obtain a free consultation.

            Best of luck to you.

      • Nichole Lindgren

        Tomorrow is his early resolution and the hearing I requested to drop the no contact order.. Anything you suggest, not to say or do??

    • Truscorpio14

      Hey my husband and I have gone through this two times And I didn’t comply with the DA I went to write a statement saying that I had made false accusations at victim witness and I also had to write one for the DA I stated I would not press charges and I would not attend court they did ordered me to go to court but ifthey didn’t hand it o me in person I didn’t have to attend so I didn’t ad they dropped all charges.

  • Grace

    My boyfriend tried to kill me. My right rib cage is sprained, my vocal cords bruised, and bruises up and down my arms. He called the police after I called my roommate to come back and the police believed him even though he only had a bite mark and some scratched from me defending myself. I spent the night in jail, I was released in the morning on ROR, and when I showed up for the arraignment they told me that he didn’t have the evidence to back up his story. I have the texts and calls I made to my roommate, pictures, and medical records of what happened. I want protection and I want to press charges, but how do I do that when the police falsely arrested me in the first place?

    • Lotus.Girl

      Text messages won’t help you in this situation, everything who’s able to be edited like text messages and vocals record court doesn’t take them in consideration, if you have a legal legit medical cert and a witness all you need to do is calling a good lawyer and he’ll tell you what to do ..

    • Lotus.Girl

      also you should report him, if you got bruises in you, you should ask a professional to take pictures, a doctor for example, and you can sub them with med cert to police, first report him for killing treats ..

    • Ali Raheem

      the police will protect their jobs not you . the judge and da will send you to jail on bs charge to avoid allowing you to sue. just try to forget about it and move on. It will bother you for rest of your life, it is better then being locked up or killed. If I could do it again I would just take 20 hours of community service and pled guilty to what ever they wanted me too. In the end it got much worse for me anyways. I should not have lost 1.5 years of my life as homeless and a friend would not have died. some one I was helping a 65 years old man ex military was beaten to death by 6 police officers for sleeping at a park during day time in Santa Barbara ca. an old commander wrote letters to help me and he was relived of command. He was told to not get involved over some one not from here he ignore it. worse is an old first sargent form military fought for me and they white power hate groups made his life difficult to where he got in a fight. military put him under micro scope and he ended up killing him self. There is no justice please just let it go there Is nothing we can do that is peaceful and the right thing to do in usa that will actually help. In the end it is my fault to not have enough money to afford a good lawyer. to be able to afford justice.,

  • Will Cisneros

    my ex girlfriend and i had an argument in december right before i went to work. she claims i threw an apple at her head and that i would not let her use the phone to call 911. the police showed up at my work and i was arrested. they tried to charge me with domestic violence but i was charged with coercion instead.
    On March 1st we had another argument and she ended up leaving the house and going to a DV shelter with our daughter. We maintained contact after she left to try to solve out our problems. I was picking up my daughter every day to spend time with her.
    On March 8th our communication came to a halt and she told me she wanted nothing to do with me anymore. The following day when i went to pick up my daughter from school as we had agreed to the night before, i found out she had already been picked up. I tried to call my ex but she wouldnt answer.
    I immediately went to the court clerk and filed a petition to establish custody since we are not married. As i was turning in my forms i was served with a protection order. She has now left the city with our daughter and i have no idea where she took off to. I cant even get her served on my petition because i have no idea of her whereabouts.
    She is trying to extend the TPO for a year claiming she thinks I’m trying to harm her and my daughter.
    All i want is to be able to see my daughter and be in her life and its my belief that she is using this TPO to prevent me from having any sort of interaction with my daughter. I’m beyond frustrated with this legal system and all its loopholes.
    She took our daughter out of our home, out of school, and out of any kind of stability in her life. My ex have severe mental issues such as self harm, bipolar, multiple personality disorder, explosive anger disorder…etc. She also has epilepsy.
    Its my my belief that she cannot provide proper care for our daughter by herself and has probably moved in with someone she met and was talking to behind my back. I have no idea who this person is or what kind of person he is. I’m not sure what his intentions are and it makes me extremely nervous and concerned for my daughters safety to be around some strange man that her mother just met and barely knows either.
    If this TPO is extended for a year i’m fearful of what might happen to my daughter if god forbid her mother had a seizure and wasnt able to watch her carefully.
    I’m afraid of what this strange man might do if anything happened to her mother (sexual abuse, abandonment, kidnapping)

  • Lotus.Girl

    I didn’t go trough any of this but I know a famous man who was accused false accusation of DV, now he is fighting only to get his name cleaned, as I’m sure women can be abused I know too man can be in the same situation, some women need to stop been like this, if he want to break up with you then tell him goodbye and move on, life doesn’t stop in anyone, but accusing people with false accusation and destroying there lives only to get revenge? this worst then killing someone ..

  • Armaan Gill

    I start drive my home for gas station.brown lady with her parents came front of me .i stop my car ,but she take more speed and hit front to front(front bumper to front bumper) my car .that time she accept front police officer,and i took pictures and videos,almost 1 month complete,my car in my garage ,even i pay $960 tow my car ,accident yard my car park there 17 days ,,what i do?claim not pass she not accept,i lost my job,i dont have any car buy groceries,please help… Today in my account $55 ..i want to send school my son ,,but today i lost everything,,i swear i want die because my life sucks because of that lady even not my fault,,,who can help me

  • james

    What laws are in place to pursue reimbursement of attorney fees once a TRO is detrimental to be false and you have evidence that the accuser knew the allegations were false when she made them?

  • Missunique Clark

    hi I’m currently going through a custody battle with my ex fiance over my son. He is ordering the court to give him sole custody and me supervised visitation. And order a temporary restraining order on me. Now this is the mindblowing part. Hes abusive verbally, physically, and mentally. And i have proff of his messages and HARRASMENT, i just never been that low of a person to charge him pr even call the police because i tried my best in ignoring his foolishness. But one day after an arguement i let him see our son and i went to help my mom move. He calls unannounced and says imma meet you in 15min to pick him up. I told him no and asked him to keep him till tge next day. He curses and gets mad and throws a temper and goes to the police and make a report saying im neglecting my son because i dont want to pick him up whem he say so he can go to work . now mind you my son stays with me and im his primary guardian and his dad do gives me money for his son. But is A CONTROLLING person. So after that i start calling and trying to get in contact with him for 2days he blocks me on any contact i had with him and then one night he message back saying hope it was worth it. So i went to his house and we got into it and he called the police. I got my son back and he file a temporary restraining report on me l. And requesting sole custody of our son. And im so lost on my next steps in this matter

  • Catherine

    My husband and I have been separated for just over a year. At the end of February, we had one of many confrontations that became physical in nature. The end result landed me in the hospital with a broken humerus (which only can be broken by brute force). I lied to the officer when he came to the scene so to protect my husband from arrest. The officer neglected to even take a statement from me, however he did take one from my husband who claimed he was protecting himself from attack and the officer later took pictures of scratches on his nose. I am being represented by CODA in my divorce and he is claiming that he is being falsely accused of domestic abuse. I have not pressed charges against him but in my counter claim am asking for restitution for my unpaid time out of work as well as my outstanding bills that were not covered by insurance. I am unsure of the proper definition of domestic abuse but feel certain that I am not falsely accusing him of such- any thoughts on that?

  • Silent TKS

    What happens to someone who is falsely accusing someone else of domestic violence in court

    • Frank Riese

      If you do not follow up, chances are nothing will happen. I think you should file a police report, insist on the taking a report, getting a case number, and consult an attorney. The crime they have committed is called “perjury” and can be a felony. It can also fall under “perverting the course of justice” if someone makes a false police report.

  • Sandy Smith

    Domestic abuse is a serious problem but too many women claim it or threaten it when it is not occurring! I believe they should be held legally responsible when/if it is proven it was a false allegation. I had a friend years ago that went through it with a screwed up girl. Ended up arrested with a ton of hassle. My sons ex(I was not found of) attempted to punch him during an argument in front of me, he caught her fist and pushed her hand away causing her to stumble. She started saying you hit me. I was stunned! She was pretty convincing. Very scary! Nothing came of it but it showed she was unstable and not a good person to be with. I just overheard my neighbors arguing and she threatened to call the police and say he hit her! What the hell is wrong with these women. It sickens me!
    If a girl ever threatens to call the police on you, leave immediately and never go back.

  • Jamie Dickson Sykes

    I am writing to you from Kingston New York. I need all The Advice I can get. I have been accused of Elder Abuse – when in FACT – I have been The Victim. My Aunt – has admitted at least six times that she lied and admitted this to The District Attorney – My Attorney – The Law Officers and EVEN The Admirable Judge. I am still to this day on probation – LITERALLY have spent over 10,000.00 in a month and 2 weeks between legal fees – hotel rooms (because The Honorable Judge placed a full order of protection on My Aunt and I) I am having to go to a substance abuse counselor – urine tests – had my mug shot taken and exposed on FACEBOOK by The Law Enforcement (Detective) the list is endless. I have NO prior record. And NEVER once abused My Aunt. I have been bitten…slapped…punched…accused of implications such as putting her in a home – stealing her home…the list is endless – suffice to say…she is 80 years old and for almost 3 years I have literally BEGGED Family Members – Neighbors – Doctors – Police Officers to help me help her before it was too late. Well – here it is…The Outcome that I knew was going to lead up to this. Please any advice would be greatly appreciated. Respectfully Yours…Jamie

  • Misty Taylor

    My brother is going through this, we have been to their house numerous times with her showing out. She’s beat him with a belt, held him against his will while he was bandaged up from a sever burn accident, and so many other things. Now she has went to an abused women’s shelter and has thembehind her helping her fight him. We don’t have money for a lawyer, she’s taken a restraining order out on him. We can’t see the kids, have no idea if they are safe. She’s on meds for bipolar and cops are telling us there’s nothing we can do. He had to give her his keep, that’s in his name, he’s paid off because of the kids. He goes to court in the 30th and we are at a loss as to what we can do. I hate how the GA SYSTEM works. Every time she called the cops because of her actions and blamed him he always left to keep themboth from being arrested. Sad thing is that he thinks he loves her still and didn’t want to call cops on her during a lot of this. The kids are my biggest concern, she uses them against him and always has. He has a Statutory rape charge on him from 11 years ago. He was 18 and she was 15 but lied about age and mom got mad. Now they are using that against him too saying bes a registered sex offender. I feel so lost.

    • AttorneyRandyCollins

      Hi Misty,

      If you’d like to give my office a call we’d be happy to provide you with a free consultation and try to point you in the right direction.

      Best of luck to you.

    • Ali Raheem

      tell him to take a deal and get out of jail alive. If he is a registered sex offender he can not fight over kids and expect to win. I know its wrong and he loves his children. But He made a serious mistake and he has to live with it for rest of his life. HE is your brother who loves the lady. is there a way you or your family can take guardianship of children away from both of them. for the good o f the kids

  • Jazmin Cheek

    Today a year ago my daughters father and his family attacked me at there home when I was picking up my child. I’m 24 years old with a college degree. I have no criminal record besides this. This has been the hardest thing in life I’ve had to deal with. Losing my job and almost my house. I get eviction notices every month because I have bail bonds to pay and court fees and anger management classes. I’ve never been a violent person. They lied because he still loves me and he was mad because I’m involved with a better man. He attacked me and instead of telling the truth he lied and said I ran inside of the house and began to beat his mother and him. They had a gun my daughter was screaming crying get off of my mommy. It was me against 5 other people, 4 men and his mother. I had bruises on my neck from him strangling me. And he has a bite on his arm from me trying to get free of him. I was afraid for my life and my daughters. He mentioned in court before that he didn’t want me to have custody of our child because him and I weren’t together. You would think someone would see all the evidence and make this right. But I’m still fighting till this day. We have visitation but he goes against it. He won’t let her spend summer time with me. He alienated my poor baby girl from her mother. My daughter is 7 he brainwashes her into thinking I’m bad and black people are bad. I have been dragged through the mud and still I show kindness to him because he is my daughters father. Im so selfless it kills me sometimes. I just pray God continues to give me strength and help me find a way through this. He has money and is able to have his lawyer corner me all the time. He lives with his 2 grown brothers and his mother and father and shares a room with my 7 year old so he has the money to do what he wants. I went to college moved out on my own and have an apartment where my daughter has her own room. I just want to give my baby girl a fighting chance at a normal life. She is extremely withdrawn because of the fear he instilling in her I just don’t know what to do anymore. All I can do is sit in her room and cry at this point. I had her so young and everyone was against me (including her dad) when I got pregnant, I fought through it all, going to school. Being homeless. Providing for her anyway I could and to have her snatched from me is truly horrific. I need something good to happen for once, I’m so tired of this pain. Please if anyone knows something that may help email me jazmincheek@gmail.com I’m a good person, I help others in any way I can. I can’t give up and leave my child with him. Please anyone. Please lead me in the right direction.

    • AttorneyRandyCollins

      Hi Jazmin,

      If you’d like to give my office a call we’d be happy to provide you with a free consultation and try to point you in the right direction.

      Best of luck to you.

  • Tamara Nelson

    Boyfriend and some one girl were arguing some girl he tried to leave she blocked his way out and he pushed her, cops explained theirs nothing they can do about it because she blocked him from leaving. But my boyfriend is already on probation. There’s no police report made but his name was given. Will he be violating his probation because of that or is he okay

    • AttorneyRandyCollins

      Hi Tamara,

      I suggest contacting an attorney you trust in your area for a free case evaluation. Each case is different, speaking to a licensed professional will help ensure the information you receive is accurate.

      Best of luck to you.

    • Ali Raheem

      if hes black or arab hes fucked

      • HUNTER

        I read your story up above and unbelievably sick. do you think if you were making a million dollars a year and could afford a great criminal defense lawyer your situation would be different? or had a video camera in your “house” or “apartment” for security reasons?

  • Nicole Anderson

    I’m a female that has been put through hell by an insane, psychopath/ sociopath ex-big/son’s speed donor. He uses the law, the police & DYFS for his own personal use & to do all his dirty work. Last year as I sat in my car with him after not seeing him for 5 wks, 2 woman pull up & as I tried 2 get him out my car, the driver approached my window & began punching me through my open window. I could not defend myself & only thing I could do was drive off with this insane stranger hanging on my car. They both went 2 police station & her story was she was just driving by & saw me attacking him & stopped 2 help him (lie) & I got out my car, punched her in the face & grabbed her hair & while holding onto her hair I got back into my car (yes the cops believed this bcuz he backed up her bs story) I then drove her down the street. He also lied & said I was threatening 2 kill him so he could get a restraining order. Meanwhile he was arguing with his ex gf at the time & told police it was me (another lie). I was charged with felony aggravated assault. I was told that if he told the truth I could not b charged with a felony which he had a year 2 rectify but he didn’t! So bcuz of lies I am now a felon on 4 years probation. If I violate my probation I do 5 yrs in prison. INSANE!! Then in February during 1 of the many pointless times trying 2 reconcile with him, he had been recording me 4 some time & while he was pretending 2 b “my” boyfriend & was at my home with me, accessed my Facebook account & posted like it was me posting, saying that I wanted 2 kidnap (lady who attacked me in car, he continued his affair with her), bring her 2 hotel room & shoot her up with heroin. I guess he took screen shot or something & then erased it so I hadn’t a clue. The next day he went 2 work & told his mother 2 come get our son bcuz I was going 2 jail. He actually went 2 police trying 2 FRAME me, yes he did this but thank the lord nothing came of it. I found out what he posted from other friends & family that had seen it & I couldn’t believe it!! I completely blocked him from my life 4 months, yet he would not stop bothering me. Telling me that the “police wanted him 2 press charges but he wouldn’t do that 2 me” meanwhile it was HIM who went 2 the police, yet he was acting like he did me a favor!! A few months later I once again let him back into my life & once again caught him STILL talking 2 that same damn lady & ended it with him once & for all. He called DYFS on me 3 times & even went 2 the police station & said I slapped him so I got charged with simple assault. I never touched him at all, he completely fabricated the story, told cops I slapped him & everyone else that I punched him. All he wants 2 do is put me in jail if I won’t b with him & it’s completely INSANE!! I haven’t gone 2 court yet but I don’t know what 2 do, should I hire a lawyer? Please help!!

    • AttorneyRandyCollins

      Hi Nicole,

      Posting sensitive information about an ongoing court case is never a good idea. If you’d like to give my office a call we’d be happy to provide you with a free consultation.

      Best of luck to you.

  • Anthony

    During the Time I was working in construction can be stressful at times it happen to me from a long,hard weeks,then car problems got me really stressful ,so I get home my gf Haas been drinking things got heated and she is the the one that hit me first that the kids didn’t as they can to see what was going on scared … They only seen the back of they mom as i push her away from me out of self-defense, but couldn’t see where I pushed her at…. kids thought. I socked her in her nose and made her nose bleed and I ain’t blaming the kids on what thought they saw they were just scared… Since I first met her I seen that wen she drinks she gets violent and want to fight I usually would leave the situation to let her calm down but wen I didn’t I actually did get assulted while I didn’t hit her not a type of person to call the cops but can it b possible if she had this type of violence that happened in past relationships before me that could help me in my case cause right now with changing P.O. Like changing my clothes to not be able to pay rent,birthday gifts ,to this 52 week class to the other court fees is making me always broke,then trying to find a job to pay this off this is making go insane. This is my first time ever getting in trouble my GF told me your the one that got arrested saying that i don’t regret on what i did i actually
    Yes I do regret for pushing u but I feel even worse for the kids on what they seen ,trying my best to fix this issue. It really suxs that she ain’t sorry for what she started and I don’t drink or drunk wen I know that I’m going to jail i was feeling left out she was the one drunk then the kids talking to an officer asking them questions confused and scared ,me talking to an officer if I’m going to jail he saying no yea right in trying to tell him on what happen but it just seem like he didn’t care another paycheck for arrest …basically i already know I’m going to jail.,frustrated so i hurried them up to take me cause I’m not getting a fair trial in this as i was accused of punching her in her nose my mom went over to pick up some of my belongings was see what happened my mom told me her nose wasn’t bleeding. I told my mom yea i know but these cops wouldn’t believe me .. But cops where i live are dirty as a hoarder ,one cops daughter kill a lady while texting and driving. The lady was in the crosswalk. Nothing really happened for that crime but if it was me or any other person we just might get a long prison term.. And cops do text and drive ,drink and drive just cause they have that gun and badge there invincible,see on the news of cops killng people of race,clothes they where,etc.. So i don’t really like our Judicial system. Making us people broke,while they get money from prisons,jails,probation terms ……

  • Kayla Marie Williams

    So my boyfriends brother & I got into a really big incident , it wasn’t a fight because neither of us touched each other , he had harassed me all day sending disturbing messages & posting things on my Facebook threatening to stab me , my grandmother & my mother, while I was at work !! He stopped at my place to gather his things because he was staying with us for a while & when he arrived he texted me saying your home , I replied that I was at work , he said no you’re not I am outside your door I heat the tv , either your home or my brother left the tv on, I replied again saying I was at work, my mother was in the house & he replied oh it’s your mom , play time ! I called my boyfriend & told him to get to the house as fast as he could worried for my mother , he got there & helped his brother gather his things. I got off work 30mins later & it takes me 23mins to get home , his brother was still harassing me, when I made it home, I called to find put where they were because at this point I had it, he harrased me all day , he threatened to kill me , he literally would not stop, & so I went to the bus stop they were at & yes I had a knife for my own protection because he already threatened me repeatedly it wasn’t out I had it in my pocket. When I walked up to the bus stop his brother pulled out his knife instantly, so I pulled mine out too ! I told him I wasn’t there for that, but we could fight if he wanted to because I was just so worn out & feed up with it all. He said some more things about my dying grandmother & I kicked a bag of his belongings because my boyfriend was in between us & he had a knife so I really didn’t want to get that close. He then proceeded to pull out a VCR he had in one of his bags & try to throw it at me, also tried to hit me with a shoe & something else I’m not quite sure what it was, as well as trying to get around his brother (my boyfriend) to get to me with his knife. My boyfriend kept telling him to go home but he kept running after me with the knife, my boyfriend then tried taking the knife from his hand, & they went back & forth over the knife for a while, I began to walk home & he ran behind me trying to stab me with the piece of knife he still had because the handle broke while they were fighting over it. He ended up accidently cutting my boyfriend (his brother). Then he said you know what I know what im going to do & ran towards my apartment which was a block away from the bus stop he scratched the back of my car with the knife. Then I called the police, when the police got there they took him to jail on probable cause charges. He was then released 2 days later with no charges & since then has threatened me with a lawsuit for false imprisonment & well as damaged property he is also falsely stating that I cut him on his neck when I never even got close to him with my knife, I dropped my knife shorty after he tried throwing the VCR at me, it has been 5 days since the incident & I have received multiple threats from his family as well as him , threats of bodily harm, being killed , being put in jail, being sued & I don’t know what to do at this point!

  • Nilla

    My husband has been accused of hitting a women . I play soccer and my team got into a fight and it was team vs team . The women who said my husband hit her . Which my husband would never hit a women , called the cops and pointed to my husband and they arrested him . they said they had a video of him, which we did not see , ( again my husband didn’t hit her ) so we aren’t worry about that . but can we press charges against her for lying ? What can I do . he’s such a good husband and father and a hard worker . I’m just scared its going to stay in his record. And the only reason why she lied was because her boyfriend was threatening me and my family that he was going to kill us, so my husband went to try and fight him ( they didn’t fight though ) and I feel she just said that to get my husband in trouble !

  • Misty

    My boyfriends mother had him charged with domestic assault because he was walking out of a room and she was in the way when he tried to get by she had no room so she almost lost her balance falling because they did make physical contact they both tried moving out of each other’s way. They had got into an argument months later and she called the police and she told them about what happened months before, therefore he was charged. I am a witness that it was not intentional and she never even got a red mark. She had no pictures hospital visit no evidence because he did not assault her. I am not being called in as a witness for him. I am the only evidence he has while she has none. Can they exempt me from being a witness it even charge him for these false accusations that there are no records of, other than months later when she wanted him in jail? West Virginia

  • Aziz Shah

    I got married to my wife…after her arrival at my home…she found crippled in typhoid fever…I arranged medical treatment for her…hence she remained at my home as bed patient…when she got back to her parents…she filed a law suit against me..with false accusation..that she was maltreated during her stay at my home…she demanded all the possible damages from me..I defended the suit through an attorney..and presented the medical treatment record to the court..she failed to prove her claims true…during the procession of case …she decided to withdraw the case and joined back to my home..after 1 year stay at my home…she pretended to attend a marriage ceremony at her home town..to earn my confidence, she , in front of witnesses signed an affidavit in my favor.. that she is going to attend a marriage ceremony at her home town..that she never got pregnant during her instant stay at my home..that she is willingly leaving 1.5 year infant (son) with me for care and custody…that, she surrender her right to invoke any court for any reason…that, she granted only 7 days leave for attending marriage ceremony…that,she will join me back at my home, at her own, after expiry of leave granted to her…but after expiry of leave…she invoked the court with false stance that she was maltreated at my home and demanded the custody of minor under section 491…the court handed over the minor to her..I sued against her in the same court for restitution of my conjugal rights…but she did not appeared before the court…the court declared her ‘self deserted lady’ and passed an order in my favor that the bride is not entitled for lively hood mentioned in marriage certificate…actually, she married to me to grab any valuable asset from me under the disguise of bride..but she failed, hence she returned back to her parents..my question is can I sue against her for the statement which she made,with malicious intent, before the judge to grab the favors of the court…where as, her false accusation is contradictory to the affidavit she had signed before the witnesses…affidavit and other record is exist with me…And what type of damages I should claim. kindly, advise me. thanks in anticipation.

  • Jeremy Pratt

    My ex-wife filed for divorce by forging my name on the FL-117. She took our two children (4&2) from our family home and stayed in our Lake Tahoe Cabin, then decided to stay between her parents home and her boyfriend’s parent’s home (bf lived w parents). My ex would not allow me to talk to or see our children, she would not talk to me verbally, but would text me constantly, 50-100 texts on some days. Petitioner (aka ex-wife) had been withdrawing money for months out of savings and checking accounts, and at separation withdrew all money from 7 accounts including our childrens. Petitioner used my SS# after separation to run my credit a dozen times, she intercepted and collected all my mail, she forged my name on residential listing agreements for our homes and property, using her mother as the realtor and unofficial step-father who is a manager/broker. Petitioner lied 23 times on her FL-150, only claiming half of her monthly income. Petitioner gave her attorney our P.O. Box #, that only she had a key to, so I had to transfer my mail to my work office but, because the president of the company I worked for was also 30+ year friends with my ex in-laws, my mail was once again intercepted and shredded. I had been the GM of this company for 5 years and upon my ex inlaws request, the president came in one day and said get the F out. I lost 32 days of vacation, profit shares with the company, and I didn’t receive my last months pay. I was then hit with a EPO, then a false non clets restraining order, then a false civil restraining order, and to top it off 2 false criminal restraining orders from 2 different counties…and I haven’t done a darn thing but give her space, adhere to her wants,etc. I only asked to not be alienated from our children. Every sentence in every declaration from her is completely untrue, she was even caught perjuring herself 8 times during trial and the judge dismissed them all. I hired 2 separate attorneys at a cost of $47,000, only for them both to collude with opposing counsel and after payment to them, I was told to default and move far away, that petitioner would never stop coming after me. When I said I couldn’t leave my children, they filed to relieved as my counsel. I haven’t seen my kids in a year, she was awarded all assets, and she is still filing more DV applications that will be granted without me being able to say a word. The craziest thing is I have all text messages from her for the last two years that show everything she has said in court or to police is a lie, but no one will look at my evidence

  • Stephanie Anderson

    The same bullshit is happing to my brother and the bitch was cheating on him the whole time and then turned around and lied to the cops that my brother threatened her and had the nerve to file for spouse support she won’t even get a job..

  • debby

    On the 17th of sept 2015, my boyfriend was falsely accused of assault with a weapon, assault and threat. my roomates called the cops on him because i refused to pay my hydro bill even when i wasnt staying in the house with them. Before this happened my boyfriend and i were not talking because i was feeling moody for no reason, i was just angry, so he was trying to cheer me up but i kept ignoring him, then i mistakenly hit his toe with the door and he was shouting cos it hurt him and he started bleeding, i was feeling bad because he was just trying to cheer me up and i started, my roomates then came out to see what was happening and they asked me what happened but i did not answer them. The next day, they all came into my room to talk about what happened and i told them nothing happened but they started accusing him of hitting me and using a weapon on me and all this while i didnt know they were voice recording the incident, my boyfriend got angry and he told them to leave the room twice but they didn’t listen, i also told them to leave and they still refused my boyfriend then opened the door and suggested that they leave now, one of my roomates was close to the door so they were both struggling to close it and then the girl later released the door and my boyfriend closed the door behind her, she said she was going to call the cops and tell them that my boyfriend pushed her which he didnt. The cops later came and i told them nothing happened that and my roomates too also said nothing happened. After this incident happened i left the house, and months later they asked me to pay for the hydro bill and i told them i wasnt going to pay for what i am not using, so they called the cops on me but the cops said they cant force me to pay, so instead they put my boyfriend in trouble telling the cops what happened and giving them the audio recording, that same day the cops came to arrest my boyfriend. I was confused because there was no evidence to arrest him until they told me my roomates gave them evidence, to me the audio recording is not evidence enough to arrest someone, this case has been going on for over a year now, and later today is his pre-trial. I really dont want anything to happen to him because of false accusation, and the worst part is that we are both international students so this might affect his visa.

  • Veronica Youngblood

    9th I finalized a divorce with my ex husband to which we share custody of my youngest daughter. I live in the same residence until our lease (both of our names are on the lease) is up which will be in 2018. The agreement that we settled on was the fact the he is to pay for food, utilities, rent and childcare since I was not awarded any spousal support. He is also an officer in the US Navy and I also agreed to not make any complaints to his supervisor in the Navy concerning any issue I might have. next day I was served a preliminary protective order – Family Abuse(reason I have nanny cam , he acussed me scrach his car. ) to which I’m not allowed near the residence and I’m not able to see my youngest daughter. I was told to leave my vehicle with the order however the car under our agreement belongs to me as we agreed. My oldest daughter is 13 years of age and is of a previous marriage. Since I was forced out of my residence I have been staying at a friend’s house with my oldest daughter. The order that I was served with states that the respondent (which is me) has committed the following acts of family abuse: Oral Testimony and the following facts support the statement above: The petitioner is active duty commissioned officer in the US Navy.

  • Kelly Zimmerman-Frame

    Hi, I was just in court today and had the charges against me dismissed by the judge and prosecutor. I was falsely accused by my husband who is huge compared to me and was on drugs and drunk, attacked me, then hit himself in the face with his own laptop on the nose causing it to of course bleed. What he did not realize is that I was on the phone with my friend who heard him say “I broke my nose” anyway, I filed a civil case against him before the criminal trial ever happened and was eventually awarded a 5 year order of protection because he changed his story and they found him to not be credible. My question is, can I sue him? Shouldnt he now be charged? The civil court found that he had in fact assaulted me. And I spent a night in jail due to his false police report. I had never been in jail and I have a small service dog. She was tramatized by seeing me attacked and then taken to jail and left with a drunk junkie. I was absolutely SICK in jail with worry about my service dog.

  • Sean Shirke

    I’m a Victim of intermidation In 2013 After buying a house using all my funds and was in debts …i was beaten,slapped spit on by my ex wife and ex mother in law,To my instinct this is thier agenda they want me out from my own home as me and my ex wife are joint tenancy of the home. I’ve made a police report and medical report,and summit my case to SINGAPORE FAMILY JUSTICE COURT.In my country women charter is very powerful.We men have not much rights here,this year i return home and ask them to unlocked the door as my rights to my house but was denied entry even i went thru many legal ways,i”m a bankruptcy and cannot afford a lawyer,My ex wife has cheated me all my money,make so many false accusation against me which is not true.i just had info that I”m eligible for a Pro bo no lawyer for my divorce case ,has nothing to do with the current charges my wife has applying a personal protection order ( PPO ) against me for committing violence thru face book and messenger.Yes i have a account with face book but i link only with my close friends and share my sorrow with my closes ones .now I’m being accuse of harassment .she does this because she wants the house 100% .but i told her it will be fair if we sold the house equally and she threaten to bring me to family court if i don’t comply.I’m diagnosed with depression and anxiety so during the first trial i stutter as i cannot make eye contact as i”m scared and traumatize.when i say the wrong things .she laugh at me.i feel there is no justice at all for men,not all mankind are heartless,their are good souls there,i wake up each morning with suicidal thoughts thinking about the next ordeal I’ve to face again and again…please advise.

  • A.

    Nov 3rd 2016, my ex fiance was banging and knocking on my door begging me to open it because she needed to see me. she had to see how i was doing. We broke up Oct 11 2016. I found out she was living a double life and was starting a family with another woman. Her ex to be exact whom is pregnant. Throughout our relationship i had suspicions but never that she would be living a double life. When things were good between us they were great. Our relationship lasted 4 years and she recently proposed in august. I broke it off with her a week before i found out she had this other life. It tore my world apart because we were still talking, possibly working things out and sleeping with each other up until the truth came out. I then deleted all social media accounts changed my number changed my passwords and asked friends and family to please respectfully not have any contact with her. i avoided her, stayed away from her, and was trying to move on. Until she came knocking on my door. twice. the third time (nov 3 2016) i let her see me. of course i thought i was strong enough to face her and i was. but she took advantage of my cracked apt door and shoved me inside to force herself on me. she took off her shirt and bra and pressed her body on mine and tried to have intercourse. i yelled i screamed and i fought to push her off until i slapped her. she immediately called the police and said i assaulted her. lied and told them i had choked her slapped her and scratched her. i happened to record the entire thing with an old phone of mine and showed it to the policemen. he said unfortunately there was a pause and we had verbal discussion the moment i slapped her so they had to arrest me,. i begged and explained that it wasn’t my fault,. that she tried to rape me and although the slap happened midst conversation she was reaching out to grab me again. He dismissed it and arrested me for domestic violence and aggravated assault. i was told not to come in contact with the victim. yet she went to visit me while incarcerated. she went twice. i was in custody Thursday night up until Sunday afternoon. i haven’t heard from her since but we have a leased apartment together which she never lived in with me but i no longer feel safe staying there and do not want to come in contact with her at all so i have no idea where to go from here. i might have left details out but it was so much that happened and in a matter of minutes and days.

  • Joy Ritchie

    I live in Kentucky. My boyfriend and I had been drinking. We got into an argument and the neighbor called the police. My boyfriend took my phone from me and while I was trying to get it back from him I grabbed his shirt and my nail got ripped off. When the police came I just wanted him to leave. I told them that he tried to take my phone and my nail got ripped off in the process but that I would not press charges that I just wanted him to leave for the night. The cops said it isn’t up to me that he had to go to jail because there was an injury. What can I do to help him

    • Randy Collins

      Hi Joy,

      I don’t review these comments very often. I’m sorry to hear about your situation. If you’re still dealing with this issue, I suggest contacting a local criminal defense law firm that offers free consultations to get more info.

      Best,

      Randy Collins

  • Christy Allen

    Ok, my husband and I are going through a case where we are dealing with his cousin that is a lady and she has a son, which she using her son to lie and say my husband sexual assault her child. (Lies) My husband is not that type of person and we have been together since 2008. Why all of sudden my husband going touch a kid May 2014. He didn’t the boy spend the night playing games in my husband office while my husband and I were going to sleep. My husband was about a 500 lb guy at that time and the boy was 14 and skinny and he also had scar cuts down his arm. When we allowed him to come over for he kept messaging my husband if he could come over and see our toy shop we just opened. He also talked weird which I mean out of know where he said if someone steals from your shop I’ll kill them. ( the kid is mental ) the mom trying say cause my husband touch him he became sucidal and started cutting his arm. She also said no he didn’t have the cuts before down his arm. Really how come I know about it I haven’t seen the kid since that day. Which now he 18 ( you know what I think they lied about his age for he 18 now). This happened May 2014 cause he a cashier at a store you have to be 18 to be a cashier…I gotta talk to my lawyer.

    Thank you for any info you know about this kind of stuff

    • Randy Collins

      Hi Christy. I don’t review these comments very often. Please do not post any information about your situation on public forms. If the situation occurred in Southern California, you can call my office and myself or my staff would be happy to provide you with a free consultation. Best, Randy Collins.

  • Amalia

    this might be a lil late and maybe soo long ago but we kinda want some information about some question we have.
    My husband got arrested back in 2005 for domestic violence which he did not commit. His ex girlfriend and him were arguing and she slapped him and he pushed her off. He left the house with their son and was stopped by the cops. She had called them and told them that he had hit her. they didn’t find any marks but still took my husband to jail then went to prison for 5 days. She didn’t press charges and no complained by DA. Then he went to court but never saw the judge and was released right after. Why was that? Why did the cops take him in if there was no proof of domestic violence? And if he did not see a judge and was released why did they charge him with 273.5(A) PC? is there anything that he could do to clean his record and sue his ex girlfriend for making a false accusation?

    • Randy Collins

      Hi Amalia. I don’t review these comments very often. Please do not post any information about your situation on public forms. If the situation occurred in Southern California, you can call my office and myself or my staff would be happy to provide you with a free consultation. Best, Randy Collins.

  • artfldodger

    My significant other attacked me and called the police, She has bipolar,schizophreniai and clinical depression.It’s the third time she has called the police, the first two times they made her leave for the night. She came home both times like nothing had happened. Last week she called them again and the police said “ok this is the third time we have been here we are going to arrest you.three days in jail, this time she is maintaining the narrative she signed a restraining order and I can not go home. She is driving one of my trucks and one of my friends said it was as loaded up with who knows what. Truck was spotted at sisters house and is now missing. Her story I’m pretty sure will be blown up by time stamps on phone calls.Her family are all bipolar as well,She has her family all fired up that I abused her.

  • erika rojas

    I was in a situation where me and my boyfriend where arguing and it appeared that he pushed me but that isn’t what happened I slipped on the snow and some lady called saying he pushed me when that wasn’t true he was arrested and charged with domestic battery and now he can’t come home how could I possibly fix this

  • Ricky L Armstrong

    My estranged wife recently informed me that she is single, when I told her that I didnt care about that, My only concern are my kids. She went and filed false charges saying I communicated a threat, slandered her and harassed her. Outside of trying to find out about my children I have no contact with her. Her accusations has me facing a mandatory 48 hours. What do I need to do to defend myself against this?

    • Rob Campbell

      Sounds Familiar! document everything Ricky, report al your concerns, i just contacted the Domestic Violence unit at my local police and told them about the false charges and allegations so they would know what was going on, keep telling EVERYONE what is happening to you

  • Edward Lyons

    I don’t know the date of my charges because all my property is at the house but it was this year. But I experienced similar things. So I knew there was something wrong with her after she had gotten pregnant. But I tried to stick it through for my child. This is my first child and I am 40 years old. So of course I want to stick around. All she ever did was agrue and complain. We would have a argument, and she’d call the police on me. I would leave and she’d beg me to come back. For a long time I didn’t think that I could have children. So of course I’d come back. And she would promise she would do this anymore. The arguments would be because she thinks I’m cheating some type of way. I’m at the house watch her twin daughters all day everyday. I didn’t know anyone in Minnesota. I’m from Chicago. I moved out there to try and better my life. Every time I tried to get a job she would insist that I don’t, because she makes enough money for the both of us. She really needed me watch her daughter’s. Til one day she called the police on me. And I left an was gone for a period of time. Again she apologized. And I came back. The same day I got back another argument is waiting on me. She leaves the house and text me, calling me all kinds of names tell me that she’s drunk and had been talking some kinda drugs. I told that I’m leaving for good. She comes back and starts to throw things at me and around the house. So I try to restraint her. So she finally acts like she is calm. So let her up. She politely picks up her phone and and start screaming blooded murder. So I’m begging her not to do this. The police come, they don’t ask me anything. They just placed me hand cuffs and charged me with all type of domestic charges. Remember I don’t have a job so I can’t Bond out of jail. Guess who Bonds me out. So now I have a no contact with her ai have to take random urine samples and I’m on probation. With no where to go, because remember I’m in Minnesota staying with her I don’t know anyone there. So guess where i end up? Right back to her house, taking a even bigger risk. I she took full advantage of the situation. Knowing that I couldn’t leave the state satisfied her. I had to deal with her BS. So I tell the public defender my story, showed her the text messages of that night. And she said that this is a woman state there’s a 90% chance you’ll lose. The mother of my son said that I choked her and came at her with a knife and a hammer, while pushing her to the ground with my son in her arms. If someone told me that story,I would insist on investigating that just because how impossible crazy it sounds. But the public defender continue to persuade me to plead guilty. Which I did because I wanted this done and over with, so that I can finally get out of my baby mother house. So they gave me one year probation with anger management classes. One day after the plea, another argument. In which she called the police and said that I was at her house an there’s a no contact with her and me. So I ended up running, got on the bus back to Chicago. So now I have a warrant. So she had been trying to get me to come back. So I have been telling her no. So now she put me on child support and trying to get full custody of my son.

  • Frank Riese

    I don’t know how to fix the legal mess we appear to be in nowadays, with false accusations going rampant. But please try to do two things:
    – Share your story with an organization that fights to reform the legal system and raise awareness for these issues.
    – Make police reports and consult a lawyer. If you feel your civil rights have been violated, I think contacting your local ACLU might be worth a try, too.

    • Gelinda Keo

      Hi Frank! I really enjoyed reading your comments. You have a lot of positive feedbacks. I have a good friend who was falsely accused of DV. His GF was crazy. She stabbed herself and made it seemed like he did. Becsuse of his background, they believed every single word this woman accused him of. SMH… Men are victims too especially when being in a wrong relationship with someone who has emotional issues and abuses drugs. Whag is ACLU? Is it possible to fight a case even though he has been wrongfully convicted and has been locked up for over 5 years? I look forward to hearing from you soon.

      • Frank Riese

        Hey, Gelinda! I am so sorry for taking so long to respond. I don’t check messages here too often and I have been working on a case.

        i am familiar with a false accusations, since I have been falsely accused as well, on a protection order. I am currently fighting to raise awareness for it. I used to be a software engineer at Microsoft for eight years and have moved out of the US because of my experiences.

        So, I am not a lawyer, but I can try to connect you with resources that can help your friend. As mentioned, google ACLU and the Innocence Project. They have exonerated a lot of falsely accused and work through tough situations. The most important first step is to get into contact with people that can help.

        I am assuming here that you live in the US. I know a few organizations in other countries as well. If this is still too vague you can contact me on riese8@gmail.com.

  • Samantha rae

    Just got out of jail on a domestic I dodnt even do. An “anonymous ” police call on me and my boyfriend the cops walked in my house and arrested me in bed on a class 4 felony for a scratch on my boyfriend that I didn’t do…he even told them I didn’t do anything and the state and hey still convicted me and arrested me. I was in for 3 months lost a baby lost my kids and my dog my job…my life in ruined I’m on probation 2 years can’t pay for the costs or the classes it’s been terrible the COs in the jail were mean and cruel and the officers that did the arrest were horrible I’m a 105 pound girl 5’3…enougj said.

  • Jose

    My sister and her boyfriend had a baptism party and both got really drunk. Then they began to argue due to a 3rd party and decided to leave the party. My sister says she was so drunk that she hardly remembers anything. All she remembers is that her bf pulled the truck over and as soon as she got out of the truck she fell. Then she remembers the police arriving and accusing her bf of spousal abuse. My sister told the police that her bf was not hitting her, but since her knee was scraped and her arm was badly bruised and had like 2 scratches on her head the police saw that and began to take pictures. Police told my sister that someone called them for spousal abuse and that is the reason why they got involved. So even though my sister told police that her bf did not hit her because she doesnt remember being hit by her bf, the police arrested him and took him into custody. He was booked as a felony and was bailed out the next day by his parents. Now he has a hearing on 02/02/17. What can happen? How can he defend himself if he did not hit my sister and my sister doesnt remember him hitting her? Please advise.

  • J. Williams

    Happened to me; she was a psychotic nut case. FACT! I understand her fear; as she was raped at knifepoint at 15 (her and her 14 year old friend were taken into the woods and raped at knifepoint- by an 18 year old dude). It was in the news and everything. It was messed-up. And though I allowed her, and her 10 year old son, to move in; I knew she had issues she needed to deal with. I tried to help as much as I could- but she just wouldn’t/couldn’t face her demons. I felt bad for her and her son. But you can’t save the world. And if you try to save a drowning person, and they fight you- you’re both going down. It was ultimately dismissed. But it’s still on my record. Spent 4 days in jail- when I actually called the police a week before my arrest. But when I called the police- I said I didn’t want to have her arrested. I just wanted her out of my house. They didn’t come out. When I tried to move out with my things, she grabbed me by the front of the shirt, and screamed nasty vile things at me. She wouldn’t let me go. I spit at her. She left the spit on her face and called the police. After she had broken nearly all my belongings. I spent 4 days in jail. They even allowed her in to visit me in the jail……???!!! I didn’t ask her to visit- don’t know why she did or why they let her in. CRAZY!!! NEVER AGAIN!

  • Rob Campbell

    This has been happening to me – I am in Australia. Totally embarrassed i even got caught up with such a psycho, as soon as i cleared out she started telling everyone including court that i “raped her” “stalked her” threatened to kill her, beat her, and that i was going to kill my two kids. She would actually slap and scratch at me. She would try calling cops when i still lived near by so i left town for good. I walked away and didn’t even try to defend myself. Why should i waste energy, Be careful of nut jobs that try to trap you with the whole”kid’ scenario. beware of this nut job the Borderline in Bordertown

    • Wolfgang Zadravetz

      your fucked its a Commonwealth country they almost always favor the woman same here in canada. in these countries an allegation seems to mean that its a fact

      • Rob Campbell

        Yes you are totally right! but if we did the same to them- we would have an AVO out on us…

  • Melissa Johnson

    My crazy ex is doing this to me now. He did it years ago.
    Had charges filed on me. Even my lawyer said it was for power control. Then he dropped the charges. He is evil sick. Now 7 years later we chat once in a while and I write him two nasty emails for good reason which he provoked on purpose. Then he says he’s going back to the judge to reopen the case wtf crazy stuff.

    This is after i get into a car accident so im vulnerable sick and stressed and this deranged monster is now trying to do this to me.

  • Rob Campbell

    Sounds like what a lot of us put up with, they are attention seekers….you are right Police need more training in when it is all rubbish and when it is real

  • farida christian

    holy prophet is one spiritual man i would forever give regards to, he brought my husband back to me after my old friend tried to blackmail me to take my husband and made him divorce me with wrong accusation. But this holy prophet did a prayer that resolved issues with my husband and push the other lady far away from him. I am happy to have my husband back, this prophet is great. his email is holyprophet8@gmail.com, he really surprised me.

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